Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Save the Ta-Tas (humor)

I have spent the last two months trying to find a job. I have filled out at least 20 applications, I've written many resum├ęs, I've driven around looking for 'help wanted' signs, and nothing. Zip, zilch, nada.
My cousin, she walks into a restaurant, smiles, and asks if they're hiring. She starts Friday. What. The. Hell!!!!!
I spend two months looking and she walks in on a spur and gets a bloody job. My drop-out cousin, whose in a trade class cause she couldn't do anything else, gets a job easier than me.
Knowing her, she was probably wearing her white spaghetti strap that makes a male wonder that if she bent over if she'd fall out of that shirt.
It's the boobs. It really is. She's a DD. Guys can't help but stare.
I need more booby shirts...

Thursday, April 22, 2010

"Falling in love with love is falling for make believe..."

I think that soul mates and true love is fictional. Finding that person that you have perfect symmetry with, doesn't exist. The stories of people that have met someone that can finish their sentences, that knows them in and out, that they honestly love with all of their heart...that's a one in a million. For the rest of us mere mortals that haven't been so divinely blessed we have to settle for someone that can be what we need.

Janix, I adore you. But I am tired of waiting for you to realize that what your sibling has is just that. Once in a million. For most of us, love is someone that we're compatible with, that makes us think 'kiss me.' You want me to be like your ex that called you every day, that needed to talk to you all the time. That's not me. If I depended on anyone like that, I would never have made it through half of the crap that I have made it through with so few scars on my heart.
I'm no one's first priority. No one goes to sleep thinking about me or wanting to call me. And if someone did I'd probably be a bit creeped out.
I've said many times that my happily ever after will be with the man that can laugh when I get weird, calm me down when I get homicidal, ground me when I go a bit mad, stop me when I try to do something crazy (or at least have a first aid kit ready), and can actually put up with me until a wedding.

I don't want some perfect life. If I had one I'd probably spend my time trying to figure out how the heck did that happen. I want a real one. I real life, a real relationship that isn't going towards some make believe future.

Monday, April 19, 2010


Yea, so I have spent the last five days or so working on the harmony of a song. And today it came to me. I wonder, since the song is about Janix that this is a sign. Who knows, but as that situation is still giving me a headache I'm not gonna spend much time on that. (Not that I regret it. It's just horribly complicated.)
Well today I gave my speech in Religions class about Wicca. Rin and I talked about it all the way home. What surprised us were the questions that were asked, as opposed to the ones that weren't.

  1. No I cannot turn a person into a frog. I would love to be able to but I am bound by human limitations. Unlike stupidity. "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." Albert Einstein
  2. Have you seen Jesus? No? You believe in him, right? So why does that mean that I have to have seen one of my goddesses for them to be real?
  3. Magick isn't flashy like it is in the movies so no I can't fly, no I can't make sparks shoot from my fingers, and no I can't move things with my mind. I have precog not telekinesis.
  4. Yes I believe in faeries, dragons, vampires, werewolves, leprecauns, and all the other fey. And yes I even occasionally see them.
  5. If I wanted to hurt someone physically I would just punch them as opposed to calling down some bad mojo on my butt. Everything comes back to you and using magick to hurt someone! I'm a black belt. I'm a rather strong black belt. And a rather sadistic one. *Whispers.* I'll just kick them.

And Rin, you are funny. But then again I'm rather mean also so you might just naturally crack me up.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Break Ups

My heart feels like its breaking. I have a theory about broken hearts. The reason your heart hurts so much is because it's telling that this isn't the path that you're supposed to be following. Your heart is saying 'stop. Rethink this decision.'
Secondly, I feel like I'm in limbo. I think Janix and I have broken up but I don't know for sure. When I said that I was breaking up with him he kind of changed my mind on if I wanted to but then said he would prefer if I did because he's certain he'll hurt me again. To hell with that. I admit it, I'm a bit of a masochist and it's not his job to make my decisions for me. I want to be with him.

Thursday, April 1, 2010


Today was...not how I hoped it would be. I had my heart torn out but somehow managed to not let it get noticed by my boyfriend.
His family would condemn me for my religion as opposed to ever getting to know me. The reason he doesn't do the same is because I fascinate him. Someone should really tell him that is sooooo not something to tell a girl. I want to curl up in a ball and sob.
Part of me thought 'maybe I should stop this now' but Goddess I love being with him so I thought 'I'll wait until I know what will happen. I will hope for a wild card.' I want to know what the right choice is: to break up with him before everything completely falls apart or wait for it to happen.